To what extent is your relationship based on your past wounds?

by | August 19, 2019

To what extent is your relationship based on your past wounds?
Are you in a relationship in which your issues get triggered repeatedly?

Do you wonder why you’re in this kind of partnership?

The reason is that the other person fills a need for you by allowing you to live within a familiar dysfunctional pattern.

Doing so can feel easier than having to confront and work through your own issues.

But this situation can be a gift if you use it to wake yourself up and transform these issues.

To begin this work ask yourself who your partner represents in your life—a parent, grandparent, teacher, other authority figure, sibling, friend, ex partner, etc.

Then, either with a therapist, or on your own if you think you’re able to, process this person as an inner figure—a part of your psyche that injures you in some way.

If you aren’t yet aware of this part of yourself, playact your partner and meditate on it until you can identify it as something in your past or your inner life.

This part of you gives you thoughts and emotions that hurt rather than support you.

Observe how this happens, and notice how you react.

Also notice and amplify the parts of you that provide solutions and changes–new ways of thinking, feeling, reacting, perceiving, and being.

After making some progress you can decide if the relationship is still right for you.

Pursuing a healthy relationship can be scary because it requires you to open up to your own inner process.

On Sept. 3rd I launch my podcast where I’m going to share lots of methods for working on yourself and your relationships!

Dr. Zwig

©2023 Dr. Adam Zwig

Meet Dr. Adam Zwig—psychologist-musician, educator, and author. He holds a PhD in clinical psychology, has had 9 Top Ten hit singles on the U.S Adult Contemporary charts, and is an internationally renowned workshop leader and lecturer. He has been featured on Billboard, SiriusXM Radio, CBS Radio, and many other stations, and in People Magazine, SPIN, Pollstar, and many other publications. Dr. Zwig has released 7 albums, and his music can be heard on National TV, including NBC, Fox, and Fuel TV. He has more than 160 million views on YouTube, over half a million social media followers, and has scored in the top 10% of rock artists streamed on Spotify in 2022. His forthcoming book, Your Problem Is Your Teacher, shows how life problems are not pathological but rather personal growth processes trying to happen. His podcast, The Dr. Zwig Show, posts new episodes every Wednesday.

DISCLAIMER: The content contained herein is for inspirational, educational, and entertainment purposes only. Nowhere in this Blog does Dr. Zwig diagnose or treat a viewer with any kind of psychological, mental, emotional or physical disorder as might be diagnosed and treated by a personal psychologist or other professional advisor. The content is not intended to be a substitute for working with a therapist but is for the purpose of educating the viewer about new approaches to working on personal problems. Viewers should use this Blog at their own risk, with the understanding that Dr. Zwig is not liable for its impact or effect on its users. Viewing this Blog does not form a practitioner/client relationship between the viewer and Dr. Zwig. Dr. Zwig is not responsible for any action taken by a viewer based upon any information in this Blog. Never disregard professional medical advice or stop taking psychiatric medication based on something you have read on this Blog without a doctor’s supervision and ongoing therapeutic support. Dr. Zwig is an educator, author, and life coach in the U.S., and a psychotherapist in Switzerland. He holds a PhD in clinical psychology. He is also a rock n roll musician.